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The view of Diane, the very beautiful Goddess of our Nights.

Yup. Clickbait ahoy! The month of May is a grand month indeed. Spring weather (bleh, give me cool sunny 70s, not this 89 at 2 AM shit!) Beltane (yay Sunlight, Horned God’s time to shine!) and a personal favorite, National Masturbation Month!

I won’t wax poetic too much about the benefits of said practice, nor will I bloviate about the potential for ritual to increase your magic’s potency if such a thing is for you. And if you’ve been following me for any length of time, you already know why and how the ‘holiday’ month started.

There isn’t truly too much to say at the moment. I’ve been working on Denial, the final Nights of Lust story. I’m finally setting up the back matter on my self-published titles up at Amazon, so our new readers will flow from one novel. To another and to another series, etc. I’ve been pushing as a writer since making a firm commitment and talking to the folks at Amazon Ad School. I’m pretty happy, though impatient, with results, but patience has never been my strong suit! We’re dealing with the one female we don’t get a POV from having the realization that the two POV characters are mated to each other and to the third. The story was called Denial for a reason.

Big piece of news? It’s been a year, literally, since I walked into the hospital and had my electrophysiologist to cut into my groin (yes, my groin, fucker LOL!) and run a catheter into my chest and freeze AND burn what he considered were the bad pathways so my heart would stop misfiring, trying to overwork, etc. In previous blog posts I’ve talked about how much of an improvement this has made in my life and I’m happy to report that besides a handful of other smaller changes I’ve made, I feel FUCKING GREAT!

Last week we had temperatures in the mid-80s and I had to work at the cigar shop for two days. Before the surgery, I’d go in, smoke my cigar, work, sell cigars, etc. and then come home in a horrible state of exhaustion. I’d nap, maybe spend twenty minutes, then come back outside to have my at home after work cigar. To paint this picture properly, I sell cigars. That means even if we’re hella busy, it’s a small enough shop that I’m literally either in the humidor helping customers, or I’m at the register ringing them up. Of course, we’re talking, too. The industry is notorious for being friendly and awesome!

The point I’m making is that I’m not busting my ass behind a bar moving product, moving between servers, customers, restocking the bar, etc.

Yet I’d come home and be exhausted.

Most of the noise in my head is STILL GONE. What’s left is mine to deal with. I have put those sleeping demons to bed. Now it’s just a house of wolves.

No more. And I cannot tell you the amount of sheer relief I feel, and the amount of joy, at almost 44 years old, have. After the surgery, I apologized to my heart. I did this in part to myself. I was a furious teenager, which translated into a furious young adult. That’s part of why I began writing romance. But all that forcing down of emotions and bullshit we do to ourselves only hurts my physical heart more. So, I apologized after surgery. I apologized before surgery and said I’ll fix it.

A year later, I cracked a bottle of Decoy NV Brut Cuvée and lit up an ATL Black (new favorite) while sitting on my balcony being thankful for my fixed heart, grateful that I still have it, and grateful for all the days to come where it will no longer be a burden because I will no longer be a burden to it.

I know, ya’ll saw the headline and expected come shots, facials, jacking off, how to get the best orgasm (sleep with me!) and all that comes (haha) with Masturbation. Ya’ll didn’t expect me to hit up the heartfelt shit, did ya’ll? LOL! I didn’t either.

Oh, and two kitties… but we’re back to clickbait again, aren’t we?

~~~Have you read ENDANGERED yet?

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